Quick Update

I apologize for the inconvenience, but due to my day being completely packed today, I won't be able to finish the 3rd part of Sawstravaganza tonight. Not to worry, that means that you guys get a DOUBLE UPDATE tomorrow! Again, sorry if you were expecting a review of Saw 3 today.

Spoiler alert: It's not very good.

Sawstravaganza! Saw 2: Electric Boogaloo (2005) Review

Well, well, well. What have we here? A Saw sequel, huh? Oooh, I'm really scared! So you're the one everybody's talking about! BAHAHAHA!

Okay, Saw 2 is my favorite entry in the series and I believe that it is also the best entry in the series. It's also one of my all-time favorite movies of any genre. Am I gonna be biased in this review? Oh, you better believe it. This movie has a 36% on RottenTomatoes and a 40% on Metacritic. That is absolutely uncalled for! This movie needs to be recognized for what it is: a terrific psychological thriller that leaves an impact on you like the first movie did, but in a totally different way. Let's get this show on the road.

Swiggity swy, what's that lodged behind your eye?

Plot time! The movie begins with a pointless victim being killed by a trap that was only put in to give the developers of the 2nd Saw video game (yes, those exist) an idea on how to start their game (pictured above). Btw, developers, starting your game off with a precision-based, timed minigame does not leave the player wanting more. 

Okie dokie! Story elements! Jigsaw's base is raided by a SWAT team, led by none other than Donnie Wahlberg, and he is captured and interrogated on the whereabouts of a group of missing people. Donnie Wahlberg is pissed at Jigsaw because one of the missing people is Donny Wahl's son. Jigsaw (played by Tobin Bell) turns on a tv that shows a live camera feed from an abandoned house. Inside the house are the missing people (8 of them, to be exact), who are all taking part in a massive game made by Jigsaw. They all have a slow acting poison in their veins and scattered throughout the house are just enough antidotes for all of them. Only problem is, in order to get said antidotes, they need to go through a trap first. Jigsaw refuses to tell the police the location of the house until the end of the movie, when the plot twist comes. If you've seen the first Saw, you know that the twist ending was ridiculous and could never actually happen. In this one, the twist is perfectly executed and impossible to see coming on your first viewing. 

Pictured: Dumb girl gets caught in a trap that is undoubtedly the easiest to figure out in the whole series.

This film isn't as well-acted as the first one, except for Tobin Bell, who always does a good job. Shawnee Smith is back as Amanda and she does a good job as well. Amanda is given a much larger role in this movie and it leads up to her becoming one of the main characters in the next film. The other actors are forgettable and their performances are too over the top to be worth anything in this movie. 

The gore is stepped up a lot in this one. Since there are 8 victims, the producers had plenty of opportunities to create new and interesting traps. Someone gets shot through the eyeball by a magnum, someone gets burned to death, the stupid lady pictured above gets both her hands stuck in a razor trap and dies from blood loss (even though a monkey could figure out how to avoid getting stuck the way she did), and as always, there's always that one trap that makes the audience just cringe in disgust. In this movie, that trap is the needle pit.

Don't do drugs, kids.

Overall, I liked Saw 2 a lot more than the original. The plot was made more interesting by the fact that the main cop was more motivated to capture Jigsaw because his son was one of the people in the house. It didn't have the same suspense as the first one, but the upgraded gore and the entire situation of this movie made up for that. I also love the creativity of some of the traps. The magnum trap is still one of my favorites to this day. The twist ending was perfect and perfectly suited Jigsaw's personality. Saw 2 gets 9 used heroine needles out of a possible 10. I highly recommend you check it out. Especially for Shawnee Smith, who I must say is looking unbelievably attractive in this movie. 

Marry me.

Sawstravaganza! Part 1: Saw (2004) Review

In the beginning, there was nothing. Then Wan created the Saw franchise and the horror genre was revived. Wan saw his creation and it was good. And that creation grew and grew until Wan became tired and rested after the seventh movie, saving his strength for his new creations, The Conjuring and Insidious Chapter 2. And on one day in 2013, Wan began production on the eighth movie, thus causing mass hysteria and confusion. Wan saw that this revelation was not taken well by the masses, and as a result, he strived to make the eighth film as good as possible in order to please his subjects.

At least we can only hope. So, the other day I learned that the Saw franchise is getting an 8th movie. Being the huge fan of the series that I am, I was both ecstatic and doubtful at the thought of a new addition to one of my favorite movie lines. That got me thinking, since I love this series so much, I should do a rapid-fire, one-review-a-day, Saw week on the blog! And here it is: SAWSTRAVAGANZA (I'd like to see you come up with something better)! Let's start out the week by reviewing the movie that single-handedly revived the modern horror genre, Saw.

So, what is this awesome movie about? Well, the police are investigating a case dealing with a serial killer known as "Jigsaw", who doesn't kill his victims in the traditional sense, but instead places them in deadly scenarios where they could choose whether they live or die. These scenarios are called "traps" and they always give the victim a chance to save themselves, but in these traps, saving yourself means causing incredible harm to yourself. If successful, you escape the trap with your life, but missing a part of yourself also. Jigsaw also isn't some random killer. He researches people and only chooses people who don't appreciate their lives. For example, one of the victims in this movie is a drug addict who only lives to get her next fix. Jigsaw explains why he thinks they are wasting their lives to his victims before the trap starts and if the victim escapes, they usually appreciate life a lot more. 

Also, there's a scary clown puppet. Gotta have something to scare the kiddies, I guess.

Here's how the movie goes: there are two main character groups, the group of cops, led by Danny Glover, who discover the remnants of Jigsaw's victims and try to "piece" together what happened, and two men chained to the walls of a bathroom. This bathroom is a trap set up by Jigsaw. The scenario is the the door is open and they are free to leave whenever they want, except that the only way to unchain themselves from the wall is to cut off one of their feet with a hacksaw. Just telling you right now, the police don't get anywhere and they get absolutely nothing done in this movie. The main focus is on the two men in the bathroom.

It's like the setup to a bad gay porno.

Throughout the movie, we learn more and more about the two men and why they're in this situation, along with some delightfully gory scenes of the cops recounting what happened to a few of Jigsaw's other victims. And then at the end, we're treated to a really lame twist ending that I won't get into here because it's just stupid and doesn't make any sense and if I start ranting about it, I won't be able to stop. 

So, how was everything else about the movie? Well, the plot is incredibly original. I can't think of any other movie that even comes close to the plot of this one. 

Well, almost.

The horror in this movie doesn't lie in cheap jump scares and monsters, or even the gore for the most part. In fact, this is probably the least gory movie in the series. No, the horror of this movie is all psychological. Yes, people get grossed out by seeing a man cut off his own foot, but after the movie they can't help but wonder to themselves, "Would I have been able to do that if I was in that situation?". And that's where this movie really shines. It makes you think. It makes you put yourself in the situation of the characters and makes you contemplate just how far you would be willing to go to save your life. 

The traps in this one are few, but they are very good. First off, you've got the bathroom trap, the one that the main characters are in. Then you've got the reverse bear trap, a device attached to the person's jaw that will snap open and break their jaw off if they are unsuccessful in freeing themselves from it in time. This trap appears a few more times in the Saw series, and has become the most recognizable trap in the whole franchise. There's also a naked man placed into a maze of razor wire, who fails to navigate through it in time, resulting in him being locked in the room forever and dying from blood loss. And here's where it gets nasty. The final trap of this movie is a doozy and even after watching this movie dozens of times, I still can't think of a way to survive this one. I present, the flammable jelly trap:

#DoneFor

Situation: UNWINNABLE. Besides the awesome traps and death scenes in this movie, the acting is pretty good too. Danny Glover does a good job, as always, and the woman in the reverse bear trap is Shawnee Smith, also known as the front desk lady in Becker. She would eventually become a main character in this series, but that's for another time. For now, she's just a survivor of Jigsaw's game. The two men in the bathroom are played by Michael Emerson and Cary Elwes and they both do a good job as the paranoid drug addict and the calm, thinking man, respectively. At times, Emerson's performance can be a tad annoying, but he's always played those kind of jittery, strange characters, so I can forgive him for that. 

Overall, Saw is one of my favorite horror movies for a reason. It's a fresh idea mixed with good acting, good gore, and a terrific angle. I give it 7 dismembered feet out of a possible 10. Tomorrow, we delve deeper into the Saw franchise with Saw 2. I'll see you all then. 

UPDATE STATUS COMPLETE

Just so you guys know, I'm currently on a week vacation from college before starting the summer semester. So I've decided to hold off on doing any reviews for this week. Sorry about that. Also, I'm sick. So yeah. No reviews this week. Next week, most definitely. But this week? Na.